Fine Line

I've always disliked the saying "I apologize" and at the same time, I dislike "I'm sorry" when it is used without feeling. I think the two sayings are different and I have always preferred "I'm sorry" - here's why...

• "I apologize" means "I know I did something wrong, but I really don't feel bad about it. And given the right circumstances, I'd probably do it again. However, I recognize that you don't agree with what I've done, so for that, I apologize."
• "I'm sorry" means "I truly regret what I've done and I'm sorry"

When I was working, there were a number of people that would use the saying "I apologize" and the above definition is always what I felt they were telling me. I truly respected a few of these people, but it always made me feel a little sour toward them when they would use this phrase. On the otherhand, the coworkers I had that used the phrase "I'm sorry" I felt had integrity and truly cared about how I felt.

The same is true at home. So, I have to tell you, it makes me a bit angry when Robbie swings his clothes around and hits his sister and me... then he says "Oh, I'm sorry" - and he repeats the same action. What he should have said was "Oh, I apologize".

So, this morning after swinging his clothes at us four times in a row and repeatedly using the phrase "I'm sorry", he got sent to his room - on his bed. Really - I'd be happy with such a punishment - but to Robbie, it's the end of the world. How can I impress on my son what it means to say "I'm sorry"? Because at this point, it's just a way for him to appease the person in front of him so he can continue with what he's doing. That's not the person I want my son to be.