She's getting about an ounce of formula to supplement. She's only taken it twice so far today, but at least she's taking it.
I was really having a hard time a few nights ago and that was when we first talked about weaning her. I felt fairly strongly then, that I didn't think I could do it much longer. Now that I've begun weaning her, I feel like maybe I didn't give it enough time.
I try to keep reminding myself about the shooting pains into my shoulders and back and into my legs. But even now, when I'm having the pains, I feel like I might be able to endure just a little more. I look at her and how comfortable she is feeding from me compared to with the bottle and I feel terrible! But the reason we made the decision was we need more flexibility. I had a flare up of the Fibromyalgia the other night - I had wide spread pain everywhere, couldn't get comfortable - and then I had to nurse her. It was not my finest moment and it's times like that in which I need to remember why we are doing it.
I do admit that I look forward to a few things - like wearing whatever shirt I want without it mattering if it has easy access. Or having the flexibility of having someone else feed her. Even not having to find a place to feed her while we are out. I'll be happy to not have to sit in the car to feed her.
But I will miss my special time with her more. With all the help and the fact that I can't hold her while not nursing (because that's all she wants to do), the only real time she and I have had together is when she's feeding. I think once I have her weaned, I will have to insist on being the one to feed her. Of course, once the visitors are gone, I won't have any other option.
Babble, babble, babble. I think I'm trying to convince myself that I am making the right decision. Here is a picture of Robbie. He gave her the first bottle! He's such a great big brother.
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