Haunted by Memories

I'm relieved that my grandfather no longer has to live with the rapid deterioration of his body. He passed this morning... peacefully. I am relieved, but saddened by our loss. As Robbie said this morning after I told him, "I am sad, he was great."

While I have been prepared for this for over a week now, I find myself caught off guard by certain emotions and memories. I'm not sure why, but certain deaths seem to rehash the passing of my brother. I am currently not only mourning my grandfather's death... but once again, I find myself mourning my brother's as well. It's been somewhere near 13 years since he passed, but I find myself shedding more tears over my memories of him.

I'm glad that the kids and I had a chance to see my grandfather before he passed. I'm saddened that neither of my kids had the pleasure of meeting my brother. I am certain that I will always be haunted by these feelings. I'm not sure that it's a bad thing. I always enjoy memories of my brother... sad or happy, it's just nice to remember him.